“I’ll never forget the day the phone rang. I felt powerless, I felt stuck. I wanted to help but I didn’t know how, who to call, or what to do. I wanted to solve the problem, but I didn’t know the first place to start.”
Being on the receiving end of a phone call or text when someone is experiencing a mental health crisis is difficult. When a loved one is struggling, you want to do everything you can to help them. Sometimes, you don’t know what that is. As a family member or friend, it can be hard to know what to do, how to act, or what to say when someone is in crisis.
For Suicide Prevention Awareness Month, Balanced You recognizes that awareness and prevention are ongoing. Our aim is to provide supportive resources and strategies to consider. The following has been adapted from National Alliance for Mental Illness (NAMI) and Mental Health First Aid.
Understand the signs
It’s important to note that a mental health crisis can take many forms: self-harm, panic attacks, suicidal ideation, planning or considering hurting oneself or others, and more. Unlike other health emergencies, mental health crises don’t often have consistent signs, instructions, or resources on how to help or what to expect.
Learning all you can about mental health is an important first step. NAMI created this video so people experiencing mental health emergencies and their loved ones can have the answers and information they need when they need it. It equips you with tools to assess the situation and questions to ask.
If a loved one is actively talking about suicide, make sure to stay with them while they’re at risk and do not hesitate to get them additional help.
Practice clear, empathetic communication
Listening deeply and without judgment is essential to providing support in the moment. Encourage your loved one to talk about what they’re thinking, how they’re feeling, and how long they have been feeling that way. You might offer, “Sometimes when people go through __, they may have thoughts of ending their life. I want to check in about your safety. Have you had any of these thoughts?” Asking clearly if someone is considering suicide creates a safe opportunity to intervene.
NAMI notes, “Don’t be afraid to ask directly if they are thinking about suicide. If they need time to respond, allow them to process. You can always repeat the question after a moment of silence, if necessary.” Listening in a kind and patient way can allow others to feel comfortable and safe enough to share what they’re going through. What’s important is that you’re showing up, listening deeply and non-judgmentally, and can connect them to more support, if needed.
Reach out for additional support
If you’re concerned, but it’s not an urgent situation, ask if they’re open to building a crisis plan or connecting to others. Re-visit what care and connection has helped in the past. Perhaps a therapist, family member, friend or spiritual leader has given them support. It’s important to tap into those systems as much as possible during this time. Support might also include researching treatment options, making phone calls, or even setting up an appointment.
If you are concerned for your loved one’s immediate safety, call 9-1-1 or an alternative resource. Remember: police intervention may not feel safe to everyone, particularly Black Indigenous People of Color (BIPOC). If this is the case, there are additional supports available within the community. Here are a few resources you can contact 24/7:
- If you are immediately concerned about someone, text Crisis Text Line at 741741 to connect with a trained crisis counselor to receive crisis support via text message.
- You may call your local county crisis line to request assistance for you, a friend, or a family member (24/7/365). Safety and wellness checks can be requested and completed anonymously.
- 988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline (formally the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline) – Call, chat, or text 988 to speak with a trained crisis counselor 24/7.
- National Domestic Violence Hotline – Call 800-799-SAFE (7233) to speak with trained experts who provide confidential support to anyone experiencing domestic violence or seeking resources and information.
- Call 9-1-1 if the crisis is a life-threatening emergency. Make sure to notify the operator that it is a mental health crisis and ask for an officer trained in crisis intervention.
Check in on yourself as you check in on others
Remember to take care of yourself as you’re supporting others. Practice deep breathing and create time for reflection after you have supported a loved one. Navigating crisis can be difficult and overwhelming. You may notice many feelings including frustration, sadness, loss, or lack of control. Creating a plan that focuses on what and who you know may help. Whether managing crisis situations or day-to-day mental health, remember that you are not alone.
Support and counseling
There are benefits and additional support provided by the County. Resources are listed below.
- Making Life Easier: Making Life Easier (MLE). Making Life Easier has mental health counselors available 24/7 for crisis support. MLE also provides free counseling and resources for King County employees and anyone in their household. For more information, visit the Making Life Easier website.
- Access mental health providers through your health plan: King County’s medical plans, Regence, and Kaiser offer broad networks of mental health therapists who provide both in-person and virtual visits. For more information, read this Balanced You article.
- Mental Health Resource Guide: For a more comprehensive list of King County employee and community mental health resources, review the Mental Health Resource Guide via this link.
- Mental Health First Aid at Work Trainings: Mental Health First Aid will teach you the common signs and symptoms of mental health and substance use challenges and how to respond to someone in both crisis and non-crisis situations. View upcoming trainings here.
Balanced You recognizes that mental health impacts us all. We’re committed to keeping the conversation going. Let’s do what we can to connect ourselves and each other to the resources that we need. For more information, contact balancedyou@kingcounty.gov.
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